I have been so exhausted lately I'm getting a bit nervous about the upcoming Blogger meet-up in Vancouver. I'm excited but worried about my limitations, so I tell myself that just showing up, getting away for a few days, meeting some new people and meeting online friends face to face is what it's all about. If I can't go tromping all over with the gang I am going to feel left out, but that's just the reality of my life. I can't do some things and there are so many things I want to do. It's funny how perspective changes when inactivity is forced on you. I would not normally like housework, not think washing the dishes or vacuuming was enjoyable by any means, but when I am struggling to find the energy to hold my body in an upright sitting position, a sink full of dirty dishes begins to taunt me, pointing out what I cannot do, and suddenly washing dishes seems very desirable.
I like a clean and tidy home but not only do I want to be able to maintain one, I want to do enjoyable things on top of that. Ha ha ha ha ha -I hear my wrecked auto-immune system laughing at me. Dream on! I had hoped to get out with my camera today, taking photos of local scenes for potential painting projects but I am a purple blob on the sofa today. I tell myself that the hazy conditions outside would ruin my photos anyhow. I tell myself I should just curl up with Margaret Atwood.
Despite liking the dishes to be clean, I let them pile up in the sink and I painted instead. In a perfect world I could do both, but when has the world ever been perfect? Perfection is boring and I do have priorities. Perfection is something I don't aim for in my painting either. I like it a little bit naive, a little bit wobbly.
So here is my wobbly project of the moment. It's a little section of downtown Courtenay, the neighbouring town, painted in acrylic on fibre board. I will likely spend another month touching it up randomly now. As with my writing, I alternately like this painting and loathe it.