Thursday, 17 November 2016

So Much To Learn, I Need Another Fifty Years

        I achieved quite realistic lighting and colours here though my lippie is a bit more browned than it looks here.

Understanding Myself Better

Fantasy is appealing, or at least it is to me.  I have a mother whom fantasy leaves cold.  I shouldn't say it like that because that is not to say that she is cold herself at all-  she is warm and lovely and very literal and practical.  Practicality and realism appeal to me enormously but I, as always, am a conflicting blend of part realist and part fantasist.  If you are imagining that I must confuse people, you are right.  I even confuse myself.

Figuring out my true personal style and colours had been enormously challenging because I had difficult sorting fantasy from reality but I needed to. Or at least I needed to get rid of the delusions.  The fantasy me might have dreams of mooning about the garden looking like a Pre-Raphaelite, or piling on the layers like a mori or lagen-lady, but the real me sits on the sofa and writes mediocre poetry with denim-clad, crossed legs and bare feet.  Deluded me is supposed to wear cool colours, loves the warm ones but believes she looks terrible in them

For some people fantasy is part of the way they dress.  For others, their clear and practical style is grounded solidly in reality.  I don't know what I truly want or like or need until I can try it out but I never really had the time, money or motivation to do that until the past few years.  It was fun but also exhausting.  Responses from the people around me vary from 'Why would you put yourself through all of that?" to "How can you even think of giving up all the creativity involved in playing with your style?"

I suppose I am just aiming for my own personal blend of creativity and simplicity.  I like to try something new just as much as anyone (or even more than some) but I need and want a framework to do that within.  I like simplicity as much as I like abundant options. 

I need to trust myself more than I have in the past.  I have always been drawn to warm colours but believed I was somehow cheating or doing something 'wrong'.  I have always known I was warm coloured but because more than one person had mistakenly said I was cool I thought they must be the ones who are right.  As I type this I wonder what would make me think that.  It's as though my inner Negative Ninny told herself, of course you can't have what you want.  These people must be right and you are not warm.

Considering how obvious my skintone warmth is to me now, I am puzzled as to how others couldn't see it either.  Some did.  There were people who used to comment on my being yellow.  It never seemed like a compliment.  Yet again, there was something about myself that seemed defective or wrong and needed fixing.  I can't blame anyone any more than I must blame myself and I think the answer lies at least partly in the effect that cooler colours I wore had on my face.  I looked pale and tired and that is how people expect me to look.  I do look pale and tired sometimes still, but I can put the right coloured makeup on and fake peachy-good-health a little better than I could in the wrong colours. 

There are ways in my life that I have been strong and there are ways I have been an easy victim.  The best I can do is live and learn.

What I have Learned Lately About How to Dress Myself

There was a time when too much colour made me feel clownish.  Whether it was in makeup or clothing, I concluded that  I must be a colourless sort of person.  Now I know that it was simply that I was playing with the wrong colours.  I love subtle and soft blends, I love analagous colours and monochromatic combinations but I also love the effect of a riot of Warm Autumn colours.  Relative to other colours the Warm Autumn palette is still a muted one, but it is definitely not colourless.  Even in all the versions of brown and browned colours that could be combined it looks colour-rich and earthy.   Dipping my toes into the Soft Autumn palette was a great start and I love the colours. It felt safe but some of them are possibly too neutral and too muted for me to look my best- those that are warmest tend to overlap into the  softest and lightest end of the Warm Autumn palette where I am now playing.  I love soft gold, cream and very soft peach colours together.

 Hastily tossed together for a run to the grocery store, this outfit has analogous colours on top but they are complimentary to the blue denim.  Colours are pretty good for accuarcy thought the sweater is a more peach than it appears.

Warm Autumn is very medium in colour value and is best with medium contrasts in value but I am very comfortable in complimentary colour mixes of similar contrast value.  Where Soft Autumn has more brown pinks, Warm Autumn has more full out oranges and golds but I would happily combine them like a sunset. My favourite reds have always been the warm autumn reds, the ones you would call brown red, brick red or red-orange.  I've noticed I tend to love all the oranges you might call burnt-something.  My nail polish is a browned-salmon.  

                     Celebrating today's photos being quite accurate in temperature and just slightly paler than reality.

                     I'm going to keep living and learning and I am going to do it in orange and gold influenced shades.  I feel like personified sunshine and it literally lifts my mood.

 True Story

I had a friend, with whom I am no longer in touch ( long complicated story ) and he claimed to be one of the rare people who experience synesthesia.  He always told me that my voice on the phone made him see sunshine yellow.

 Explainy Technical Bit

 Value contrast is where a shade falls on the white-black scale with all the greys in between
 Colour contrast is how far apart two colours are on the colour wheel.
 Low contast is adjacent colours or shade values and high contrast is opposite ones.

1 comment:

  1. Love the photos ... the setting is perfect with your love of books front and centre!!! I also love orange and am going to surround myself with more of it.


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